Monday, December 1, 2008

I'm Bald!

Well, it finally happened, right on day 13 and 14, just like the nurse said it would. I noticed yesterday in the shower that there were a lot of loose hairs in my hand when I ran my fingers through my hair. I had a little crying jag, not so much about the idea of losing my hair, but not wanting to look sickly, like a cancer patient. A few hairs continued to fall out throughout the day, but nothing extreme. Then, this morning, when I ran my fingers through my hair, clumps were coming out.

I was in a much better frame of mind today and decided we'd shave it right after Michael got off to school. My sister was up already. I woke up Janaya so she wouldn't sleep through the fun and we got out the clippers. Janaya was trying hard to be appropriately sober until I told her we had to laugh and have fun with it. I could tell she was relieved. She had been worried she would laugh and make me upset. I'm finding throughout this whole ordeal, the more I can find humor in things the easier they are to deal with.

I decided to do most of the shaving myself. It took hardly any time at all. Janaya took pictures and Pam kept exclaiming how beautiful I looked without any hair! My head is still covered in short stubble. I was amazed at how gray it is! I prematurely grayed in my young twenties and have colored my hair ever since. This is the first time I've really seen how completely gray it is.

I've been wearing my wig all day and am getting comfortable with it. It is somewhat longer than my regular hair (well, a lot longer now!), but the girl who cuts my hair said to leave it this length for now. We could always cut it, but once it is cut it stays that way. Wigs don't grow! I got a terrible headache earlier because it was too tight. We called the wig shop and they told us how to loosen it up and it feels much more comfortable now.

I'm going to try and post two pictures. One is a funny one Janaya and I took after we were done shaving my head. I hope you all appreciate how brave I am in posting it! The second one is of me in my wig.

Chemo tomorrow, so I probably won't write for a while.

Till next time,

Love you all tons!



velvet brick said...

I was just thinking the same thing that Pam said about how beautiful you are withOUT hair!! And I love your wig, Martha!!! The color and style look fantastic on you and you look like you just stepped out of a salon after a day spa treatment and makeover!! Either way, you are beautiful!!! My nephew went bald with his treatment and they did the same thing - got out the clippers and everyone got a turn at him and they made a party out of it! Humor is such a POWERFUL 'medicine' and I believe everytime you laugh, every cell in your body laughs, too! That HAS to be healthy!! Thanks for the pictures and update... I think you look cute as a bug!! : )
Pamper yourself this week, dear friend! We love you!

N-Search of Peace said...

I really didn't believe it to be possible my friend....
I couldn't even, remotely imagine, you could ever BE more beautiful!
Stay laughing IS what life IS all about....

Love you sweetie....


Katie Askins said...

You look so beautiful, with your new wig AND bald! I love the style of your new "do". I think you are very brave, for lots of reasons, not just for posting your pic! I'm so glad you did--you're wonderful. It was such a thrill to see your picture--you look radiant. Loved the "important thing" poem you sent in to the class-mind if I make a copy? It was such a "Martha" piece of writing--it made me happy.
Keep laughing. Love you, Susan

Dottie said...

Dear Martha,

You just continue to amaze me!!! Your bravery, your courage, your sense of humor, your humbleness . . . you truly ARE an amazing woman!!!

I'm kind of thinking that the IBC didn't have any idea of the powerhouse of a woman it picked on!!!

We all love you, care about you, and miss you, Martha!!! We don't want to be in the way but we certainly are waiting for that moment when you tell us what you need or what we can do!!!

You are such an inspiration, Martha!!

Lots of love,

Jane said...

I am so happy that I was given your blog address! I have been thinking about you, as well as kept you in my prayers.

I just have to tell you that you look beautiful!

I am so happy to be able to stay in touch with you this way. If you ever need anything at all...we are all here for you!! I really do mean that.

Victoria says to tell you hello.

I loved your thanksgiving turkey story. It made me laugh!


The SAB team said...

Hi Martha!! There are so many thoughts and feelings that have run through my head and my heart. . . too many to put into words. I will just say that I think about you every day and send out prayers for you every day, every chance I get! With much love, Sheila