Hi, everyone. Sorry I have not updated the blog in a bit. I've been wrestling with all the new emotions that have come with my diagnosis and just wasn't sure what to write.
Joe and I went up to Tuscon yesterday. I got a new port put in and I recieved the second dose of my new chemo regimen. I now have two weeks off before I go back. Right now, we're keeping all body parts crossed, hoping the cancer will respond to the chemo. The chemo makes me shaky and tired, but overall it is pretty tolerable. The last couple of days between last week's treatment and this week's I actually felt almost normal!
I found a cancer support site called Inspire where there are many women, some with the same type of breast cancer that I have, who have fought it for a long time. I found their stories encouraging.
My family has been amazing! Pam was here until Wednesday and was my rock. She just listened to me and supported me and loved me through all kinds of emotions this week. Having her for my sister will always be one of the greatest gifts I've had in my life.
Joe and I were totally overwhelmed at first and were feeling pretty hopeless. We have had to discuss and make plans for a worst case scenario - not easy, but we've done it and now that we have, it feels like we can move past it and focus on the fight ahead. I love my family and my life way too much to give in to this disease easily. I know so much of it is out of my hands, but I am going to go at it with all the fight and spirit I've got.
The kids are so inspiring to me. They have been so strong and loving and supportive. No matter what course this disease takes, no one can ever take away the gift I've been given of seeing them grow up into such wonderful young adults. The three of us picked out toy chests and ordered one for each of them. I will be placing books in each of them to share with their own children some day. Reading together with them as they grew up was always my favorite part of the day. This will be a way of passing that on.
I am enjoying the beautiful weather. Joe bought me a chaise lounge chair and a big red market umbrella and put them out on the patio so I can sit and enjoy the weather, rest, or read. Joey came down for two days. He, Janaya, and I spent Thursday at As You Wish. He had asked me to make him a picture frame. We had a great day together. Michael is going to prom next weekend and I was able to make it out to the mall to help him pick out his tux. So, it feels like we are reaching a new "normal" around here and it feels good.
Just one picture today. Janaya and Andrew (who we love for being her rock through this) stopped by on their way to a wedding. Andrew wasn't dressed yet, he is in the wedding party, but here is a picture of Janaya. She is just gorgeous, inside and out!
Love you all tons!